Calling Out the Clowns

Today I’d like to thank those responsible for organizing the Saucon Valley Spirit parade held this past Sunday.  It turned out to be a beautiful day and well attended.  My fiancée, son and soon-to-be step daughter attended and although we should have sat in the sun or dressed a little warmer, fun was had by all.  My fiancée and I especially enjoyed people watching.

I have been a resident of Hellertown for over twenty years now and I very much enjoy living here.  Although it has grown quite a bit over the years, it still has that small hometown feeling.  Except for the never-ending ongoing Route 412 construction, overabundance of pizza shops and the occasional meth lab, it is a great place to live.  What I could do without are some of the ignorant, inconsiderate residents.  It never ceases to amaze me at the lack of manners and loutish behavior of some of this town’s citizens.  A great example comes out of Sunday’s parade.

While many of the parades participants were throwing candy out to the kids, one of two jack mules (insert alternate word for effect) riding motorcycles actually had the nerve to deliberately step on a piece of candy right in front of my step daughter as she bent to retrieve it (see picture of the offending moron).  Apparently they may have been associated with the Youth Football group in the parade.  You say maybe it was an accident?  I would have thought so too if it wasn’t for the nasty smirk he gave her after stepping on it.  Who acts like that?  And who were these two idiots and why were they in the parade to begin with?

While I am at it, I would like to call out some of the people of this town who find it necessary to drive 40 mph up through Polk Valley Park on a Saturday morning during kids’ soccer games.  We take our dog to the dog park on the weekends and I have witnessed first-hand the blatant disregard for child safety.  Hellertown’s finest could have a field day writing speeding tickets in the parking lot.  Nobody can be in that much of a hurry to get to a seven-year-olds soccer game.  And driving a BMW or Land Rover affords you no special privileges.

I could go on giving example after example of the inconsiderate, foolish behavior of some people in this town.  Like the people who hold up traffic on 412 while they make an illegal left turn onto Meadows Lane.  The people who leave the shopping cart in the parking space at Giant instead of returning it to the cart corral. Or the people who don’t clean up after their dogs.  You know who you are.  I will point out this is a small percentage of the population.  Most Hellertownians are very decent hard working people and I love this town.  Don’t let a few alcoholics, ignorant clowns or meth heads ruin it for the rest of us.  Remember, stupidity does not discriminate.  Don’t be a victim.

Marc "Wiggy" Kovacs – Herald of Hellertownian Hebetude