Do You Know Your Neighbor?

I know the title to this post may seem ridiculous to some. "Do I know my neighbor?" Of course I do! They are Sally and Bryan. But seriously, do you KNOW your neighbor? As in, do you share a garden with them, invite them to cook-outs and birthday parties, have game nights with them, exchange recipes, laugh together and help each other out? In other words, are you friends?

I enjoy finding the idyllic in certain eras, and I truly admire specific aspects of the 1950s. I recognize there is much fault in this decade, what with racism, segregation and prejudices, and truly I could NEVER live in a time when there is so much ignorance and unkindness overlooked because a person looks different. 

That being said, I also adore the stability, importance and time that were put into the nuclear family and community. The '50s were a time when the whole family sat down at the dinner table together, helped out with chores, and did things together as a family and community. 

I fear that the importance of family and community are dwindling fast. I believe that if these two things disappear, then we will have more violence, distrust, stealing and crime. I believe that if we continue to ignore each other and the real relationships in our lives, and instead stay obsessed with our virtual reality status, our society will fall apart. Obviously there would have to be more dramatic changes happening to cause the crumbling of society as a whole, yet it is not impossible to imagine. This is why I feel it is important to know your neighbors, spend time with them, care for them and help them. This is why we must do the same and much more with our own families.  

I am fascinated at how priorities have changed--even in the home. For example, the average number of TVs in a home today is three. Of course, the TV was relatively new in the '50s, so there was typically only one that was watched by the family as a unit. My neighbor Kathy, who grew up in the '50s, explained to me that back then the TV was a big box of fuzz until 5pm, and then there were three shows to watch--just three--and you watched them with your family (because every show was family-friendly and of course everyone only had one TV). There was only one phone, which was shared by the family, as opposed to our one-phone-per-person (even if they are in second grade and eight years old!?) culture of today. Are you kidding me? There was no such thing as the Internet in those days; therefore the distractions, and the information, were not available. Families also shared one car and one bathroom. There weren't big family malls--just diners and soda shops. Video games, iPads, texting and email hadn't been invented, so playing in the neighborhood with friends, full conversations with your spouse, and quality time were rarely interrupted. Think of all the new, shiny distractions we have today!

But I digress.... Actually, speaking of my neighbor Kathy, six years ago when I moved into this lovely town I had a knock on my door. There stood my neighbor Kathy. She held a fresh loaf of bread in one hand and a house plant in the other. Her instant kindness was the beginning of a beautiful friendship between our families. And then Bill and Helen across the street brought over some delectable sweets and old cookbooks to give away. These are couples who were kids and teenagers in the '50s, so they were taught and are passing on the '50s way of being neighborly. Since then I have tried to be neighborly in return, by baking, cooking and sharing what I've made with the people around me.

And it's a comforting feeling, because I know, trust and adore my neighbors. We all share vegetables and fruits from our gardens and trees, we invite each other to cook-outs and birthday parties, and there have been plenty of times when I have asked for a few eggs, a cup of sugar or a bowl of milk.

Tell me, do you know your neighbors? Are they your friends? Can you rely on and trust them? If not, here are a few things you can do to be a good neighbor and get to know the people around you.

- Bake a pie and give it them

- Share things from your garden

- Invite them over for dinner

- Share some homemade, soup, bread, jam, etc.

- Rake their leaves

- Shovel snow from their driveway

- Go caroling to them at Christmas

- Write a small note of thankfulness for them

- Pick up trash cans that have blown away

- Send a card for their birthday

- Have them over for your kiddies' birthday parties and cook-outs

- Try not to blare loud music after 8pm

- Wave, smile and say "hello" when you see them, and ask how their day was

There are plenty of other things we can do to be kind and neighborly, and it pays off. Even if the other neighbor isn't reciprocating, we have a good feeling in our hearts, and eventually any frosty feelings from the other side will melt away.

I love my neighbors. I am so blessed and I truly hope you are, too!